#156 My Relationship with My Body

Hey, this is Melissa Parsons, and you are listening to the Your Favorite You Podcast. I'm a certified life coach with an advanced certification in deep dive coaching. The purpose of this podcast is to help brilliant women like you with beautiful brains create the life you've been dreaming of with intentions. My goal is to help you find your favorite version of you by teaching you how to treat yourself as your own best friend.

If this sounds incredible to you and you want practical tips on changing up how you treat yourself, then you're in the right place. Just so you know, I'm a huge fan of using all of the words available to me in the English language, so please proceed with caution if young ears are around.

Hey everyone, welcome back to the podcast.

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I am so glad you keep coming back to listen to Your Favorite You every week. So I am recording this podcast about my relationship with my body. It's kind of overdue. As with most women, and I'm sure a lot of men, my relationship with my body has been a complicated one.

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I was in elementary school gym class way back in the early 1980s where I first got the idea that my body was a problem. I've mentioned it on the podcast before. But my gym teacher wanted my mom to bind my chest so that I would not be a distraction to the boys in class.

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And I have so much to say about that, but just to say that this is where I think I first got the idea that my body was a problem for me and for other people. And of course, this has been reiterated by society's messages over the years to me and to women at large.

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And really until recently, I have never really been comfortable in my own body. I have yo-yoed with my weight for most of my adult life. And if you've been listening for a while, you know that I lost nearly 60 pounds with my first coaching experience and really was able to keep it off for the first time in my life.

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And then I had plastic surgery in 2019. I had a mastopexy with implants. So that is a breast lift, a breast reduction, and implants. And I had an abdominoplasty at that time. And then over the years between 2020 and 2024, I slowly regained the weight back.

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Despite staying pretty true to the plan that had helped me lose the weight back in 2018, I was still walking frequently. I was using intermittent fasting. And I was eating, you know, real food most of the time.

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But between the pandemic and becoming an entrepreneur, I had lots of reasons why I couldn't possibly quote unquote do it all and still maintain my body weight. And then in 2024, I recognized that I was starting perimenopause.

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So I started on estrogen and progesterone and started to feel better in my body again. I was certainly less achy. I was sleeping a bit better. I felt less inflamed. And then started on testosterone in late 2024 to help me with my bone health and to help prevent muscle loss as I was aging.

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All the while, my hemoglobin A1C was slowly rising and creeping toward type 2 diabetes levels. I never quite got there, but I was creeping that way. And I was offered a GLP medication by my PCP, Dr. Ryan, in 2024, early 2024.

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But I told her, no, I wanted to try to get rid of the weight again on my own. And I honestly had multiple biases against this medicine at that time. And probably more true, multiple biases against myself taking the medication.

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Fast forward to October 2024, I started working out with my trainer. Her name is Cassie Jacobs. Shout out to Cassie. And I was just going through my texts with her to make sure I had the timeline right.

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And I love how decisive I am. I found her online. I reached out to her on her website. And she was in my basement by the next morning at 8.30 a.m. doing our first session. And in all honesty, my screening questions to her were, do you believe in vaccination? And do you believe in a woman's right to make decisions about her own body? Luckily, she answered affirmatively to both of these. She's a nurse and we were off. So we live together for about one hour, two days a week, and she offers great workouts where I feel both pushed and loved all at the same time.

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So anyway, I've been doing all of this. And although I was growing more muscle, I was not seeing much change in my weight and my A1C was only staying the same or going up a little bit. I want to talk for a minute about how often my clients, my amazing coaching clients, are my greatest teachers.

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So when we were in Tulum together at our retreat in January, one of them brought the idea of taking a GLP medication up during our coaching, and we were coaching on it. Remember, I still had my biases about this medication for me when this came up, and I still think I did a pretty good job of coaching my client from a pretty clean place.

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Meaning, I don't think I brought my biases and did the coaching. Then a couple of the other participants shared that they had started taking one of these medications and that it had changed their relationship with food. And after losing weight and being able to move around more freely, it had changed their relationship with their body. I was so inspired by their truth-telling and sharing and their vulnerability, and I never once thought of them as taking the easy way out to get healthier.

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So I started to question, why was I holding myself to this standard? So now I'd like to reveal and check the biases that I had against taking this medication for myself. The biases I had were that I knew that I had gotten rid of a significant amount of weight on my own without medication in 2018, and I thought I should be able to do that again.

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I also had the thought that I didn't want to be on a medication for the rest of my life, totally neglecting the fact that the way that I was headed, I was going to need to be on my blood pressure medicine for the rest of my life.

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And I was likely going to need to start to take another medication to control my blood sugar if I did not get rid of some weight. And I know for sure that I'm going to take my estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone for the rest of my life. You're going to have to pry them from my cold, dead hands. So the bias that I should be able to do this on my own and the bias that I didn't want to take a medication for the rest of my life. So I busted through those. I also had a conversation with my sweet hubby, who has loved me at every shape and size since 1995. And of course, he was all in for me doing whatever I needed to do to feel good in my body. And he then became the coach in this situation and coached me up to really consider it.

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So I called my PCP and I got started on Trezepatide or ZEPBON at the end of February. I have been very fortunate that my insurance covers the medication, so taking it has not been cost-prohibitive for me, although I would argue that the results that I've been able to achieve by taking this medication are priceless.

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I also have had some nausea on the first few days of the week following injecting the medication. So I asked for a prescription for Zofran from my doctor, and she's been on board with that. So if and when I start to experience any nausea at all, I take the Zofran and I feel better in about 20 minutes or so.

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I'm also so encouraged by all the research that's being done and how these medications could potentially help my body and other people's bodies in ways not specifically related to type 2 diabetes and obesity, which are including but not limited to the prevention of neurodegenerative diseases like Alzheimer's and Parkinson's, treating and preventing non-alcoholic fatty liver disease. And these meds are even showing promise in reducing the risks of certain types of autoimmune diseases and cancers. So I'm very excited to see how this all plays out with time.

Okay, so back to my journey with my own body. I started feeling a bit lightheaded during my weightlifting workouts in early June, and I was like, oh, I wonder if my blood pressure is low. And of course it was. So I was able to stop taking my blood pressure medication and I have not needed to restart it.

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The next thing that happened in this journey is that I went to yoga at the end of June and I was very tight in my hips in a restorative sound healing. And I realized as I was struggling to stay in child's pose because my hips were so tight that I again needed some balance in my life.

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So I started going back to yoga in the studio several days per week. It's amazing to me how much being on the GLP and GIP medication and losing weight has changed my relationship with my body and with exercise. So I think the combination of me prioritizing sleep, taking hormones to support my female body, me lifting heavy weights, me doing yoga, walking, drinking enough fluids, and eating enough protein has been amazing.

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I feel like a different human, and I finally am able to love being in my body at the ripe old age of 52 and a half. I love my muscles. Lifting weights has definitely made my chaturangas easier and better. And doing yoga has made my weight training easier. And sometimes I glimpse myself in the mirror and I do not recognize me, this stronger and fitter version of me.

Of course, because of who I am, I have really worked on my mindset too. In doing my own IFS therapy with my therapist, I was able to find a fourth grade version of me who was still stuck in the gym with Mrs. Boron at the St. Pius X building. I honestly knew that I had experienced trauma during grade school and gym class, but I did not realize how stuck I actually was in them. Sweet nine-year-old Melissa was still in that terrible blue and white one-piece gym outfit that we had to wear. It was blue on the bottom and white on the top with buttons and a Peter Pan collar. It was truly hideous. And this younger version of me had the belief that she had been carrying around since 1982 that her body is a problem. In the session, I ended up raking her out of that gym and we burned the gym outfit in a fire. And since then, this may sound strange if you've never done IFS, but since then, I've invited her to come with me to my workouts. So I invite her to come to the basement with me when we're lifting with Cassie or to the yoga studio where my friends and instructors, Bonnie and Ikta, guide us through amazing practices. This nine-year-old version of me can't believe that we actually enjoy exercise so much right now. And if I'm being honest, my 52-year-old self has a hard time believing it some days. And of course, because of this, my inner dialogue before, during, and after exercise is so much kinder to me.

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All of this to say, if you are struggling in your relationship with your body, I get it. I really do. If I can change the way that I see and live in my body, you can too. I promise you. I was compelled to write this episode after I ran into one of my former soccer mom friends.

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Her name is Deanne. I saw her at yoga a few weeks ago. And after class, Deanne said, Lisa, I don't think I ever really thanked you. And I was like, for what? And she said, you saved my life. And I was like, what? Because Deanne is a breast cancer survivor and she's a badass. She was referring to a conversation that we had at the high school one evening about intermittent fasting. I shared that I was using intermittent fasting to try to be healthy. And Deanne started fasting after talking to me and gives at least some credit to fasting, helping her kill off her cancerous cells. I had the thought that I love the fact that my authenticity and my transparency and me just being who I am out in public, out at soccer games, might just help another person in some way.

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So I thought now is probably the time to share with you all about what I've been up to for the past year that has completely changed my relationship with this 52-year-old body. I know many of you who are listening are brilliant, high-achieving women. You are excelling in your careers. You show up powerfully in your families. You can solve complex problems and lead with confidence. And yet, when it comes to your relationship with your body, you might feel stuck or lost or defeated. You might be the woman who can negotiate multi-million dollar deals, but feels paralyzed by the thought of going to the gym. You might be one who can manage multiple teams, but you can't figure out why you can't just stick with a plan with your body. You might be someone who gives incredible advice to your friends, but beats yourself up every time you look in the mirror. So here's what I want you to know. Your body struggles don't negate your brilliance. They don't mean that you're weak or you're lacking willpower. They often mean that you're carrying around old beliefs about your body that you formed when you were younger, like you were nine years old, just like I was.

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Maybe your version wasn't in a hideous gym romper at St. Pius X building at St. Mary's. Maybe it was a comment from a doctor. Maybe it was being picked last for teens. Maybe it was a family member's offhand remark about what you were eating or your appetite. But somewhere along the way, you learned that your body was something to manage, control, or fix rather than something for you to love and care for.

And if you're someone who's been considering medication, whether it's hormone therapy, one of the GLP and GIP medications or anything else, but you're holding yourself to this impossible standard of doing it on your own, I want to give you permission to question that. You probably don't think twice about taking medication for your blood pressure or wearing glasses to help you see more clearly. Your body deserves the same practical, loving care.

The amazing women I coach often struggle with this all-or-nothing thinking around their bodies. They think they should be able to willpower their way to healthy or they feel shame about needing support. But becoming a favorite version of you includes becoming someone who treats your body with the same compassion and practical wisdom that you'd show a dear friend or a younger, more vulnerable part of you.

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So if you're listening to this and thinking about your own relationship with your body, whether you're struggling with weight, fitness, hormones, or just feeling at home in your own skin, I want you to know that it's never too late to start over.

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It's never too late to question the beliefs you've been carrying since you were younger, since you were nine like me. You don't have to do it perfectly. You don't have to do it the quote unquote right way.

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You don't have to do it without help. You just have to be willing to start treating your body like it belongs to someone you love because it does. And maybe your willingness to be honest about your own journey, like Deanne reminded me, might give someone else permission to start their own.

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Because when we stop hiding and start sharing our real stories, we potentially give other people permission to write new chapters in theirs. Your body isn't a problem to solve. It is not a project to perfect.

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It's your home for this one beautiful life, and it deserves your love, your care, and your partnership in becoming a favorite version of you. Okay, thanks for listening and I'll talk to you next week.

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Tuesday, September 30th at 7 p.m. Eastern. Stop trying to think your way out of being stuck and start trusting yourself instead. I'll see you there.